My Natural Hair Journey...What I've Learned.

Hello My Loves....

So, for the past 5 months I and my 2 best friends have been transitioning to our natural hair texture, meaning No Perms (aka. Liquid Crack), No Texturizers, No CHEMICALS...NONE! I rarely use heat in my hair and are fighting the call to weave it up (which is a great protector for natural hair) I'm trying so hard to stay as natural as possible and that includes all beauty products and food intake (whole other story) but, I must say this is one decision that has made me so honest and open with myself and the world around me looking deep into my societies standards and the manipulation of the human psyche. I have watched as my relaxed and westernized minded sisters and  brothers glare and stare in AWE of the choice I have made and sometimes just pure looks of disgust run across their faces. We, also have the looks from other cultures, which are usual glances of curiosity of my hairs texture and thickness, full and natural. I have realized that not everyone will except the "Natural Look" as Empowering or even Beautiful, but I give respect to my creator who made my hair this lovely curly, dry, frizzy, thick, full texture. And I had to ask myself the hardest question of all, as an adult Black woman. Why am I continuing to Relax my Hair????!!!??? Of course! Because society and the world I am apart of deems my Natural kinky, Thick, Coily, Frizzy hair as uncontrollable and unattractive, to society that is. In reality that basically deems me as a person unattractive and uncontrollable without societies standards of Beauty stamped on my being, Oh Tou'che America the Beautiful! I have embraced my uncontrollable hair as mine, if we were in a time where there were no salons or relaxers I would be rocking what I have now, without apology. My response to whats beautiful and standard in society today is..... Shut-Up, You Know Not What You Speak of, Only God can Judge me all society can do is make standards that even those they place on a high pedestal cannot stand up to. I love myself and my God who made me in his liking too much to live up to what you imagine, determine or comprise I Black woman should look like. I will stop at that, cuz I can go IN and HARD about society. Damaging ourselves and our mirror image as a race has been consistent throughout civilization, while so few fight to reverse the damage done.... Jules-

So, join Me and my lady loves (Kiki and Michelle) on our self learning Journey to freedom of societies chains of BEAUTY and support us for LOVING ourselves the way God made us. Pics coming soon!

Peace and Much Love
Jules
XoXo


I'm here to share a great YouTube vid that just rocked, I loved the honesty and message this awesome woman named Shekiarenea was sharing, she is a natural sister working out the kinks and coils like a pro, WERK! Don't try to pronounce the name just watch the Video!  lol Enjoy her Post!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bhooV36H0Z8&list=UUszE6JPoQGDHE2vccrpD40g&index=4

Single, Successful & Country Bound!!

Howdy,

So over the past three months I have been doing major research of small country towns commutable to NYC, because there comes a time in a persons life (Not every person) where they ask themselves, Where will I make my Home?... Is this my home anymore? I realized though NYC has been my home for 22 years its time to walk away, the city streets I’ve come to know as paths I take in life, have become worn out roads I no longer wish to follow (Did I just make some poetry?) Anyhow this huge city of dreams and lights, has become a small town to me. The only thing that holds dear to me here are my family who has lived here since the 50’s, my friendships and ofcourse my upbringing, I am the definition of a New Yorker and I’m so proud! Throughout my life NYC (aka; Concrete Jungle) has given me amazing experiences that have contributed to the personality of me. With that this will be my last year living in this great city, as I will attempt to indulge in country living, while pursuing my new found career “writing". MMM.. I can just smell the apple crisp! 

You may be asking, why would a single, successful woman choose the country?

Well, to put it simply, I am writing a book (because as we know I want to become a writer) and I’m finding it hard to write in the city (crazy, I know). I cannot find enough peace and quiet, which has lead to serious writers block, theres just too much going on around me (Hence the name “City that never sleeps”). There seems to be no longer a balance, and so instead of becoming the "angry New Yorker" I’m going to just take myself out of this noisy/busy equation and escape. With this choice, I find moments of fear, which lead me to do deep research seeking information such as amount of crime, best schools and single life. Yes, single life because I am single and seeking a devoted spouse (well I wouldnt say seeking, haven’t been on a date in months, whole other story) Anyway, I'm seeking a better way of life, fresher air, nature, better schools and the reason I’m totally sold on moving WAL-MART SUPER STORE!! Need I really say more lets not leave out dozens of outlets at my fingertips (Including the Fabulous Coco Chanel which does not give you pricing over the phone even though it’s an outlet). 

Get my point? Hopefully, you do. They say the grass isn’t always greener on the other side, well the grass is greener on the other side of highway I-95 and i’m packing my bags cause i’m ready to mow the lawn and sip on some Lemonade!

Wish me luck! Any advice is welcome as we continue..."Journey’s of a Struggling Writer”.

Xoxo
Jules
Peace, Love and Square Dancing!

Be MindFul When Traveling Abroad....Really?

Click Link To Read Article By Belle
http://www.abelleinbrooklyn.com/blog/2013/1/7/essence-traveling-while-black.html


Hello All,

Thanks for patiently awaiting my late posts, its well into the first month of the year and I have been planning and plotting on an adventurous and productive year. I have finally committed myself to writing and giving you guys a gigantic window into my life and journey to become a published author, wow that was so easy to write and while writing it my heart skipped two beats and I broke a mini sweat, because I know this journey will be exhilirating and challenging at the same damn time! But with all of you guys support and encouragement I see a great end to this journey. 


What Have I been Doing All This Time???

Over the pasts few months I have been networking and joining so many groups to get myself out there, it has been alot of researching and emailing in my attempts at being pointed in the right direction, so I have started following an awesome author/blogger named “Belle”, if you havent heard of her then you need to check her out immediately. She is a relationship advice writer with contributing colums and articles to such elite resources as Essence magazine and Black Enterprise, I love/respect her work and have come to use her as my imaginary mentor on how to represent yourself as a successful writer. I have also realized that with my new found career choice I must upgrade myself education wise (totally by choice). While I am a firey English language guru I must gain a better understanding and dicipline of great writing (Stephen King Say’s “Just write”) ummmm, your Stephen freaking King give me something better to work with, lol! My College professor (English Literature) handed me my 8 page paper on short stories we read throughout the semester and with great intensity went on to tell me “You Should Really Consider Writing as a Career”, of-course I looked around to see who he was talking to (Duh), but totally understood his opinion after going over my grades with an advisor who as politely as possible tried to tell me I suck at every other subject. But, strongly saying, I have a choice become a counselor or writer “choose wisely" she says. So, here I am making my mark in the blogging world.... God Be with me!


What Have I Been Reading..hmmmm???

I have pasted a link above about an article in which Belle talks traveling abroad, I myself have made future plans to venture out into the world of foreign cultures, languages and road maps. And, to my surprise I didnt expect to read about outlandish acts of steroetyping done in other countries to black American tourists, in all honesty I had the calming perception that it would be less pressure to represent myself (Damn you Spice Girls). I had a kind of "they will take me as I am" attitude towards my planning, hoping to be freely open eyed and adventurous as any other tourist. BIG GIGANTIC RED X!!! Apparently traveling abroad is were you really get an idea of how far steroetypes and being portrayed in the media as something you’r not can go, that without even realizing were stuck in this twilight zone of judgement and its WORLD WIDE. But, I don’t have time to let these portrayls of what people see me as, stop me from exploring my planet that God made for us ALL. It actually makes me want to venture out more, and without regard or apology represent the beauty and essence of being Black and Proud. 


XoXo 
Jules
Peace & Love

Opinions and Comments Greatly Urged!!!





  

HAPPY NEW YEAR ALL!!!!!

STAY TUNED WORKING ON READER WORTHY NEW POST FOR 2013 COMING SOON!!!

HOPE YOU ALL HAD AN AMAZING NEW YEARS, MINE WAS SPENT ON THE COUCH BUT TO MY CONTENTMENT IT WAS EXACTLY WHAT I NEEDED. 

LOOKING FORWARD TO NEW BEGINNINGS, ENDINGS AND LOTS OF LOVE!!! 

XOXOXO CHEERS!
JULES

THE RE-BUILDING OF BLACK LOVE....S.O.S!!!

S.O.S....S.O.S!!! I'M FORWARDING A MUCH NEEDED S.O.S!! READ BELOW!

I stumbled upon this great article that I must share because its much needed... My Response & Reflection...

A Call to Action: Help Single Black Men Keep A Woman!!!
http://www.clutchmagonline.com/2012/12/a-call-to-action-help-single-black-men-keep-a-woman/

December 10, 2012 by Demetria L. Lucas Click Link to Read Story.

 
This is by far the BEST topic to end and begin the year, This "Call to Action" is so needed with the coming of the New Year.
 
I'm no relationship expert or guru, but I have mastered the art of telling it like it is when it comes to men and what I expect from them while dating, which is probably why they run fast the moment I respond to Bullsh*t as their language. I myself being a successful black woman and still aspiring, have put dating on a major halt due to the incompetence and lack of what we call "good black men" out there. I have decided instead to just sit back, watch and learn my prey, instead of complaining there aren't enough good men out there, I have chosen to analyze the sought out sex and see why I haven't found one compatible for my liking. I cannot speak for every woman when I say my standards have changed as my age changes, what I wanted in a relationship at 25 is definitely not what is needed now. As my education advances and my careers gains speed, my wants and needs in a spouse are standard, not unrealistic and I definitely won't settle, I've worked too hard to be with someone that doesn't inspire or compliment me and the future I'm striving for. With that I have studied and learned so much from the opposite sex, and I must say that this S.O.S. should not be just for black men, but women as well. We have put so much emphasis on the lack of black men that we forget it takes TWO to build a great family... So, which sex is really lacking?

We cannot look at all black men and think how terrible they are, while in or after a failed relationship with one, and still have any hope of loving another. We must get to know any man before we judge him based on his past or present. As I have said before "you cannot really know where your going if you have no recollection of where you come from" and this goes without saying when entering a new relationship. We as people so many times jump into intimate relationships without really getting to know each other, without asking the right questions, so that we know from the beginning and yes, not everyone is honest, truthfully this is especial within African-American unions. And my lovely black women, I have to ask the age old question, How could you start a family with a man you hardly know? And then complain when the relationship fails???!!!! You have no idea who this person is but know enough to have a child with, this notion confuses me time and time again, my head hurts thinking of such gesture. The cycle of unmarried black homes continue and is getting worse, black boys who turn to men are finding no value in marriage because it is not portrayed within their homes or neighborhoods majority of the time. The lack of black fathers and strong, educated black men are going unseen and unheard, and we all as a race are to blame.

As black people weather you are raising your family alone or with support, strength comes not from seeing you put food on the table and being able to provide your family with the best you can, but realization of who they are, where they come from and your push for their greatness is detrimental in a black home especially today. So many lost and misguided children come from homes of no hope or no education, so lost that most young black men and women have no true respect for their past or present and sadly enough that leads to no passion for a clear future.Young black boys, become men and then old men, as young black men many without the guidance of a loving, supportive or educated man around often find hardships in growing to be confident and strong men, unless their single parent or guardian have some positive structure. Radio has become a open mic for foolish, uneducated and ignorant unimportant rant and raves of money, clothes and even more demoralizing of black women from our very own black men, its sad to say you'll never hear a white artist downplaying a white woman to the point of out right hate. Its obvious to say young black men are continuing the cycle of degrading black women and we not only have slim to no positive projections of black men with the exception of our president, but we have very little black men looking to make it better within their communities. I as a woman live to talk to young black girls about how great they are and can be no matter what hand life dealt them in the beginning of their story, great stories always have amazing twists and turns in them. We as black people have no one to blame but ourselves for the projection we give to our youth today, we have so much education and exposure, but still were trying to find a way to point the finger at our own faults and failures. As the New Year comes into existence, I say to all my black people stop making excuses and correct the situation! We are becoming victims of ourselves, what are you doing to change it?

I have watched and analyzed my black brothers and sisters weather they be single, dating, married, In families (RARE) and will continue to, I love watching mixed race relationships as of recent. Now, I'm not a stalker of any kind I just enjoy watching people interact especially black men and women, watching a couple who is clearly in some sort of intimate relationship, you can see why they are so great together or failing. But, to see a black couple or family in total love is something the word beautiful cannot be used to explain, there is a reason people stop to watch the black family interact, Father, Mother and Siblings, communicating, laughing, together, how lovely the view.... Now imagine this is NORMAL to see. 


With Much Love, Peace and Sincerity in the New Year!
Jules :)

Leave any comments, I love reading you guys thoughts and comments....

Cheers to The Holidays!!

Hello All!

As you can tell I’m still getting use to the whole blogging craft, but I ensure you it will get better! With that I have deciplined myself to leaving a post at least once a month, life is so hectic, but awesome! 
So please cut me some slack, and Thanks for even reading the caos that comes outta my head.

Peace and Love 
Enjoy!


Cheers to the Holidays!
Lets give thanks to unpredictable life, comedy worthy family and never ending laughter with great friends, I pray God continues to throw us all in so many different whirlpools of learning and emotions, in which we will all become better movers in lifes obstacles and belivers in blessings. As I watch the world around me move, I notice how far gone so many of us are. Holding no morsels of hope and being so unaware of realites of whats around us, they continue to just  move about as if nothing matters but, thyself. Selfishness has become one of the biggest epidemics next to the common flu, and I myself find times when I am guilty of it. With the world being so cold all on its own, the need for human kindness should be no surprise, it brings a warmth during the holidays that gives the whole “Winter Wonderland" a pinch of life. Instead of looking down upon or judging others, including giving the most hideous, cold faces of  “love" to each other and yes I am talking to you my brothers and sisters especially, young and old casue lets be honest we dont now how to give warm welcoming glaces to each other here in NYC and so many other places, Its kind of disgusting to say the least, but I cannot change eveyone just myself. It’s a huge self esteem and confidence issue within yourself when this happens, people dont realize this. So, join me lets try and give warming glances, appreciating thy neighbor for who they are and if you have words spoken how about starting or ending with a Good Morning, afternoon, evening and the very best for this time of year, Happy Holidays! Its called common courtesy, if common sense is possible (in some cases I will strongly say it’s not ), (lol) then common courtesy should be easy. Even though living in NYC, aka the “Big Apple” can be very frustrating at times with so many walks of life within this city, making you want to take that, “Big Apple” and pelt it at the heads of some people! (I dont condone or promote violence) But, we must remember this time of year is for kindness and giving to one another, which most times costs nothing. 


There is so much history in the holidays, The Christmas Tree and lights represents God and forever Eternal life.

Remember we are reflections of the futures after us. Just as things in life change, we must change how we reflect.

Weather it be good or bad, how you handle every situation determines what happens next. What happens next could be good or bad, but that all depends on how you handled the situation!


I Wish You all Happy Holidays and Blessings into the New Year!!!
Jules :)

Mis-Education of Our Children... WTF??

Well, Lets not forget the fact that we are ranking 14th in reading alone and we speak english, I’m too ashamed to even say the what we rank in “Math”!! God Bless the asian community, and were a “Capitalist” country, I seriously beg to differ in so many ways. If you know anything about your history, my mind bending question from my last post you will realize how far back Mis-education really goes in this “land of the free," I mean facts are we are a country built by European theives and criminals. So, what could we expect? We can barely find the right man to run the country so we give each man who comes just a tad close to perfect by a longshot, 8 years each, if there lucky! I call that the best poker game ever... I CALL YOUR BLUFF AMERICA!! You are creating the dumbest children in the world, why??? I have no idea, and frankly neither does this country. I have veered from wanting to educate the youth in this world, to wanting to counsel them and their families instead. Why? You ask, well simply put, were not really teaching them anything, except how to get jobs. Lets not forget half the teachers, usually hold FINANCE or ORAGAMI degrees and have not a clue about child development. All because they pay teachers crap and expect them to educate a mis-educated country, O..K.! 

By all means I cannot soley blame America for our Mis-educated children, because America is not the parents of these amazing kids. I won’t go too hard on parents, not now... but soon. I’m not a parent myself but was raised by a No Bullshit you’r not gonna be sitting here stupid with me... Mom. And of-course FAMILY, We called it “School of the Hardknocks” you either Get it together or Get it together with harsh realities of life, your choice! 

Gone are the days of Current Events classes, teachers staying late if students need help and student and teacher respectable relationships. But, where do we begin, the cycle continues and its only getting worse. I asked one of my students what he wants to be when he grows up? And his honest answer was... Rich!... My second question to him was.. In what???

Jules